Breakthrough

As I was driving home with my mom (we were carpooling because she was going in my direction this past week). I really enjoyed driving with her this week; it was surprisingly ok....anyhoo but as we were getting closer to the house I started to think about my last three years of being dropped into "official" adulthood. I have learned a couple things like:
1. One wack job that I ACTUALLY HAVE is better than 2 really "bomb" jobs advertised on the net, newspaper, whatever, in the bush. I have tried 2 direct marketing jobs, volunteer jobs and just plain being unemployed. I made a mistake of quitting a job that was truly stressing me out (at the time) and being unemployed for about 8 months.....So not cool.....Because God had a sense of humor, not only was the job that paid me the most ever, I also look back at it with a chuckle, a smile and a sense of accomplishment!!!
2. I realised that all my life, people had been telling me that I had potential....Potential to do what??? I had no clue. I realized that all my life I had been depending on others' opinions of me to justify my actions...I had made that realization that when it came to my personal life (friendships, realtions, relationships, etc). I just realized that it is also true for all aspects of my life. I have been letting people tell me what they think and act off of just this information. Not doing any research whatsoever, (personal, pratical, etc). The sad thing about this, is the fact that I get upset when I tell people I disagree and they get miffed....Whatever! I truly have had a breakthrough people!!!
3. I realized that this potential that I have has been just that: Stored. I have not translated this into any type of action...Well I have, but not as much as I should have. That is the reason I am at the place that I am right now. I have never believed in myself, I have believed in what other people saw in me. How can I expect myself to achieve anything if I do not have confidence in myself. One of the reasons I have been so confused about what direction my life should take is because I am so used to telling people what I was thinking of doing and when no one agreed/ thought it was feasible, I'd be thrown in a tizzy. How can I expect to get anything done? The only person I need to confer with is Jesus and if He gave me the vision, why should I be bothered with what people think???
4. I'm lazy. I like to sleep, eat, and read. Not necessarily in that order. I need to change that and accept that sacrifice is part of accomplishment....
I think that I am done...for now.
Thanx for reading. Until next time.......